Yes, I was out last night, as my editors would somewhat vehemently agree. The throat infection's a bitch, okay. Amazing how a little thing like that can bring the whole body down. Well, not really down, but it makes one feel shitty. Speaking about which, yesterday morning's Agony In The Toilet was nothing short of amazing. Much wall-pounding and floor-stomping action, complete with a cacophony of swears and curses courtesy of yours truly. I don't know how it happened, but my faeces decided to consolidate themselves into one HUGE FARKING CHUNK the size of the asteroid Bruce Willis blew up in 'Armageddon'. Now that - was horrible.
Today I feel utterly useless. I have this sudden premonition that nothing's going to come out of my life. I sit at my terminal and do the work I'm supposed to do, and I don't feel myself moving forward. In fact, I feel like I'm getting sucked into a black hole of some sort. Suddenly my future - which has always been unclear - is unclear. Clouded the future is. Not that it's been anything else. But for some reason, it's depressing me today. And making me feel utterly useless. Well. Yay. Another step closer to purchasing that bottle of sleeping pills. Embrace the Sweet Oblivion.
To make me feel better, I would like to remind myself that I stepped into some quality dog poo this morning while walking to my office. I went to the toilet to wipe it off with some toilet paper, but the smell is still there, a constant reminder for me to kick any dogs I see on the way home.
Important Shit You Should Know Of The Day:
A Beer Lover's Practical Guide For Losing Weight