Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Mind Shift

There's this guy at work I would really love to kill. I want to bash his head in with one of the heavy walkie-talkies lying around. I want to wait in the carpark after work for him to make an appearance before ramming him down with my car. I want to kidnap him and torture him for the rest of my life. He really gets on my nerves with his constant noise. He sings (badly). He laughs loudly. He makes noises he thinks will amuse other people.

Today of all days, I feel at peace with his noise. Something in my mind shifted, and now I think he's just slightly retarded. I mean, I don't think he is. At least, the nice part of me doesn't. The dark blob of hateful darkness inside me INSISTS he's so retarded that he spends his free time staring into open space while drooling. The middle road Buddha in me calmly states that is merely him.

So I'm at peace. I might even nod encouragingly at him the next time he decides to shout at the OTHER retarded asshole on the other side of the office. I need to shift my mind even more to accommodate the rest of the people working here. Slowly. These things take time. This is a strange world indeed if I have to believe the worst of everyone in order for me to get along with them.

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